j-town j-town!!

Yup im goin again, kl is getting boring that much faster, it gives me time to miss stuff anyway  i like having a little me-time..n feeling independant again...its good...lets me realise what my goals r again n release my stress...

Im gnna do it this time...

• If i bump into her anywhere, and she even tries to make up a story
  
• im gna smack her one, n ill make sure that there will be noone around t stop me.....BITCH
  
• Then im gnna tell her what i think of her
• Then im gnna threaten that if i ever see her in my area, or even in my breathing space, she should be careful...iv been waiting to do this for a long time...and i dont even have a solid reason, i just think its about time, and right on so many levels..

Bitch-->da la gemuk, ingat org percaya u lg??? i dont think so coz these ppl got proof, it doesnt work anymore, u made everyone run away from u coz u have a serious attitude problem, and even tho i dont see u, everyone is telling me stories about crap uv been doing that i didnt even know about, ur a hypocrit, and u gonna get whats cming to u...so either u stay away, or come a bit closer and try my patience.

For ur info - The truth never hurt anyone, but its gnna hurt u..coz ur so caught up telling lies, ur not aware of ur own life.....so sad..i almost felt an inch of sadness for u..

When life turns ironic? all of a sudden

Isnt it weird how, u can know someone for about 5 years but actually dont know them at all?

even tho u used to be close n everything, dont get me wrong, everyone has their secrets..but its weird when u sorta end up figuring something out about someone, or just the fact that u just know that something isnt right about a person.

I just found out from a few friends that 'THIS PERSON' takes trips 45 mins away every weekend or every week just so that 'they' can get jiggy under the covers in a hotel on a hill...and does 'Ice'  like isap batu kind of ice and has been bragging for ages shes a virgin but actually hell no she aint....and my friend showed me the text that one of 'them' sent to my friend about asking where he can find 'ice'  is this true..

I think im more shocked than anything..

Its a shame that some people dont open their eyes, and sumore the gf is payin for it..since she pays for everything, but she still cant see shes being used, its sad you now to watch something like that (if u cared), but maybey what goes around comes around aye, maybey she deserves it..

Maybey she asked for it. well good luck to that, but like three of the people who were with me read the text from my friends phone n we were all shocked, i mean we didnt expect them to be doing THAT, what a way to fuck up ur life.

To be honest with you, yeah im shocked, but i couldnt care less, coz its their lives but to think that u think u know someone n suddenly.....finding out from other people summore About their activities..

I know nobodys perfect, but for gods sake look at what u r doing...they dont realise they r showing people these kinds of things, n people can already work out what they r up to..they just dont know it..its actually become a joke amoung  my friends..

To put it all out, we met them once up there, n my guy friend said that The 'girls' 

bf told my guy friend that 'they' both just finished doing ice b4 we arrived....isnt that like really messed up, its not cool to do drugs, or show how proud u are to be in a hotel....isnt it kinda...embaressing? what ever is private, keep it private laaa rite..

What is this world coming to?  .SHIT.

Ya know what

As a reply to my last post, MAYBEY THIS FEELING IS NORMAL IN A RELATIONSHIP,  maybey im just being selfish and weak, why should i give up when things start getting hard?

I cant live my life this way forever, i need to get over the obstacles that come my way n hit them all down.

i mean you tell me how easy it is to find the right guy..

i know he loves me more than anything, and i wont let stupid ideas get to me, i will get thru this, and do watever it is that must be done!...

im giving up..

I just dont know what to do with my relationship, i dont know where its going, this is no engaged relationship, its not how its supposed to be...he has changed, he always complains and gets angry in ways i never knew possible, its more of a rage than just a simple anger moment.

I dont know what to do anymore, i just feel that i cant do anything anymore, and im on the verge of calling it all off, i cant stand having to chase after him all the time, and being blamed for everything, and everything being my fault all the time..

Our relationship doesnt seem to have that spark it used to have the last time..i dont know why..

i just wish there was some little voice in my head saying that everything will be ok, or telling me to be stronger or tell me to just hang in there...im hoping for this voice to come out faster because im on the verge of calling it quits, as mush as i hate to even think about it, im just losing hope, its not all of a sudden, but it gets worse all the time...do i just need a break away from him? do i just need to do my own thing? i dont know..

iv tried hard to try n figure things out...maybey i just need more time...

a heart in a million different places

my baby siti...shes adorable!! volunteer work soon..
Siti the elephant


i got big love for my guy, but what do you do, when u just cant have ur way on ur ways of doing things?

i just dont know what to do anymore, am i falling out of love? but i still cant picture myself without him, hes everything to me, and we have gone thru so much together...( hell and back)

I always question myself, and if this is the guy i can spend the rest of my life with..

i never questioned myself before..so why am i doing it now?

have i seen better things? have i opened my eyes to other things?

experienced better?

what is wrong with me?

he is stubborn..but why do i feel i just cant get my way around things?

yet i still continue to contemplate if he really is the one?

why am i questioning everything?

do i want this?

am i ready?

im lieing if i say i didnt see i coming, but i somehow kinda did in a way..

is my love looking for another face? is my heart looking for something else or is my head playing with me?

i just cant defrinciate which one i need to follow..i cant end my relationship coz i love this guy too much, hes everything to me, but i think maybey im indirectly trying to picture the person i want to see, but maybey is not there? i dont know.....maybey i cant just have everything i want my way....

so i went to the zooo....it was so much fun, i had a huge crowd watch me feed the elephant, her name is siti..i pla to work with them soon, n continue my work on animal rights awareness...